However, many times, the only way to realize that life is difficult for our spouse is when you start to complain. So instead of worrying about truth or run to help, we may think that you have a bad attitude. We do not realize the pain and pressure he is going through in the same way we do with our pain and pressure. When we complained, we hope that everyone will understand and sympathize with us.
This does not happen when there is love . You do not have obvious signs of distress the wake of a shock to love. Before the concerns and problems begin to haunt your spouse , love has been put into action. Discern the load begins to accumulate and intervenes to help because love wants you to be sensitive to your spouse.
This is the kind of needs you should look at your wife or your husband. Instead of walking is angry because you do not as you think you should let love you out of self-pity and turn your attention to the needs of your spouse.
They have a life ahead together. To live more happy, it is good to know the opinion of your spouse on issues seemingly simple but certainly do not know the detail, in any case, the mere fact of them to your husband and he will do them for you, you will see how feeds you new ideas. Here are some questions :
What is your biggest hope or dream?
What do you enjoy most about your life right now ?
What do you enjoy least in your life right now ?
What would be your dream job if you could do something you love and get paid for it?
What have you always wanted to do but have not given you the opportunity ?
Who do you feel more "safe" ? Why?
If you could have lunch with anyone in the world , who would it be and why?
When was the last time you felt full of joy ?
If you had to give away a million dollars , who would you give it ?
What three things do you like me so much ? What three things I do Madden you ? In the past, what have I done to make you feel loved? What has made you feel ignored?
What three points I can improve ?
Of the following items , what would make you feel most loved ?
Listen how much I appreciate it.
What would you like to erase everything that has happened in the past?
What is the next important decision that you think God wants us as a couple?
How would you like your life in five years ?
What words would you like to hear from my mouth more often?
You can not change your spouse . No matter how much you want it , you can not play God and get to your heart to transform it into what you want it to be. However, many couples spend much of their time trying to change your spouse .
It has been said that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. But is not what happens when you try to change your partner ? You get most of the frustrations . At some point , you must accept that there is something you can do.
Does not work scold or annoy ? The answer is no, because these methods do not change the heart . Instead, it's time to try to talk to God about your spouse. If your spouse does not have any kind of relationship with God , then it is clear why you have to start praying . Beyond this , start praying exactly what your partner needs . Pray for his heart , for his attitude. "
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Zapping Loving
Something that no one is free and we must fight relentlessly and according to him, arises because people have high expectations of marriage and when he sees that the problems begin tend to want to drop it and many times looking for other people.
The problem is that this way of relating surface causes us deep dissatisfaction , and that man needs a solid ground on which to build his home and dreams.
If we are always flowing from one relationship to the next, the feeling of being constantly can overwhelm beginning to become skeptical about love . Why is this and what is the solution? .
Our civilization of desire, hedonistic , destroys feelings. It's a generational trait , the less masculine , this enormous difficulty of spending the rest of your life with the same person. It is as if the world was organized in such a way that prevents you from loving you.
Maybe because love is too subversive , it is certain that between pleasure and happiness pushes people to choose the former. We live in the era of loving zapping . We consume many products constantly , and it also leads people to consume .
The problem is that this way of relating surface causes us deep dissatisfaction , and that man needs a solid ground on which to build his home and dreams.
If we are always flowing from one relationship to the next, the feeling of being constantly can overwhelm beginning to become skeptical about love . Why is this and what is the solution? .
Our civilization of desire, hedonistic , destroys feelings. It's a generational trait , the less masculine , this enormous difficulty of spending the rest of your life with the same person. It is as if the world was organized in such a way that prevents you from loving you.
Maybe because love is too subversive , it is certain that between pleasure and happiness pushes people to choose the former. We live in the era of loving zapping . We consume many products constantly , and it also leads people to consume .
Why bother ?
One of the things I've learned lately is to not bother . I realized I really did not win anything , and if I lose a lot with the fact do . In the end, also upset the other person , pass an unpleasant moment and end just pass me .
I think something more useful is to learn to manage conflict , I'm not saying there are not to be passive , quiet and not say anything and let you go over , but on the contrary , doubly keen to really know how to act in those uncomfortable situations so as to take advantage of them and get what you want to convey to effect change in the other person .
This helps a lot the content and form of our message , sometimes a matter of saying things but with a different intonation , no offense to the person, but the act did , in this way, gaining strength our position is better received . But people are not talking about behaviors, and the distinction is crucial.
It is not the same as saying you've done wrong, documenting this claim , to judge you as a bad person . Not just observe behavior and draw conclusions in light of irrefutable facts and figures , which focus on a series of disqualifications surface .
Another sage advice I received is that one should not rebuke you feel the outrage at the offense. - Wait for the next day, or even longer. - And then , calm and purified intention, be sure to reprimand . 'You'll get more with a kind word with three hours of fighting.
We must learn to be content with whatever comes, and especially to maintain serenity , as if, despite having put all the effort to come out somehow things did not turn out in the end , it is because God knows why does the things , and sent the more we agree .
I think something more useful is to learn to manage conflict , I'm not saying there are not to be passive , quiet and not say anything and let you go over , but on the contrary , doubly keen to really know how to act in those uncomfortable situations so as to take advantage of them and get what you want to convey to effect change in the other person .
This helps a lot the content and form of our message , sometimes a matter of saying things but with a different intonation , no offense to the person, but the act did , in this way, gaining strength our position is better received . But people are not talking about behaviors, and the distinction is crucial.
It is not the same as saying you've done wrong, documenting this claim , to judge you as a bad person . Not just observe behavior and draw conclusions in light of irrefutable facts and figures , which focus on a series of disqualifications surface .
Another sage advice I received is that one should not rebuke you feel the outrage at the offense. - Wait for the next day, or even longer. - And then , calm and purified intention, be sure to reprimand . 'You'll get more with a kind word with three hours of fighting.
We must learn to be content with whatever comes, and especially to maintain serenity , as if, despite having put all the effort to come out somehow things did not turn out in the end , it is because God knows why does the things , and sent the more we agree .
What life has taught you ?
Life has taught me that human beings (or at least I) want certainties and life is uncertainty. We want things to be a certain way and we find it hard to accept that things are as they are , not as we do we want to be .
That in life you have to take risks , you do not know how things will turn out we take ... but if not we risk we will not know ... that there are two options, or I will you play or not the you play . In short , life taught me that it is better to befriend the idea that in life there are no certainties , securities, because if you don't friends with the idea just arrested ... without living in fear of who knows what. "
Another reviewer mentioned that he had learned is to live with a clear conscience , is still in the process of cleaning. And I think that's a constant.
What why I ask these questions ? Because the mere fact raise them yourself makes you think. Now feelings are fashionable and good, but people feel and feel and act solely guided by that and think nothing at the end .
It is worth going through this question , and that is recognized as an idiot because he thinks that life has taught him little, not, on the contrary, has the humility to recognize as it is, and knowing that it has a long way learn.
A fast and free advice , beware of those who do not question their successes or worse, those who do not appreciate and feel superior for achieving them.
Part of the maturity of a person is questioning the why of things and of their actions, because that will allow you to amend the road when you have to, and not believing it too when you've reached the unreachable so that you can continue to use the opportunities that gives life with humility and simplicity .
Trains passed only once in life, usually take passengers awake and cautious you are willing to ask questions and cross-examine really be worth it .
That in life you have to take risks , you do not know how things will turn out we take ... but if not we risk we will not know ... that there are two options, or I will you play or not the you play . In short , life taught me that it is better to befriend the idea that in life there are no certainties , securities, because if you don't friends with the idea just arrested ... without living in fear of who knows what. "
Another reviewer mentioned that he had learned is to live with a clear conscience , is still in the process of cleaning. And I think that's a constant.
What why I ask these questions ? Because the mere fact raise them yourself makes you think. Now feelings are fashionable and good, but people feel and feel and act solely guided by that and think nothing at the end .
It is worth going through this question , and that is recognized as an idiot because he thinks that life has taught him little, not, on the contrary, has the humility to recognize as it is, and knowing that it has a long way learn.
A fast and free advice , beware of those who do not question their successes or worse, those who do not appreciate and feel superior for achieving them.
Part of the maturity of a person is questioning the why of things and of their actions, because that will allow you to amend the road when you have to, and not believing it too when you've reached the unreachable so that you can continue to use the opportunities that gives life with humility and simplicity .
Trains passed only once in life, usually take passengers awake and cautious you are willing to ask questions and cross-examine really be worth it .
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